...like a thief in the night

Today's blog title may be a tad misleading, but whatever. I meant to write about this when it was fresh in my mind, but I'm still laughing about it...so...again...whatever. Z has actually been sleeping quite well; I've been impressed at his ability to throw together 9 to 11 hours of uninterrupted sleep. Well, uninterrupted may be misleading (I'm doing a lot of that today). He still talks in his sleep quite a bit and occasionally needs his daddy to come in his room before our alarm goes off...but we are fine with that.

I'm wondering when as a parent, you feel good about turning off the monitor completely? Is this another proverbial cord I need to cut? There are so many of those and I have a feeling there will be so many more...Anyway, Saturday night, I think it was around 2 a.m., I heard Z start his usual sleep moaning. But then when I noticed he started to cry I of course asked David if he heard that (my cue to make him get up haha) and he on cue, got up :) But Z kept crying and I heard him ask to blow his nose, so I knew he was awake. I got up and grabbed a tissue then headed into his room.

He was sitting on his knees in the middle of his bed just sobbing. I could tell this was not a night terror, because he was fully aware of us in his room so the conversation went a little like this...through tears and sniffy breathing:

Me: Why are you crying Zachary?

Z: I had a bad dream

Me: Oh I'm so sorry, what was it about?

Z: It was about the Pastor...about Pastor Bill

Me: (trying to not laugh out loud...sympathetic) Oh well, what happened?

Z: The pastor took all my stuffed animals out of my room and he took my books too

then the crying got worse again for a few seconds.

I was trying so hard not to laugh, because honestly, I can't imagine Pastor Bill taking anyone's stuffed animals and books.

I reassured Z that it was only a dream...wiped his tears...gave hugs and kisses, shuffled back to my bed and left David in there to console Z. He of course fell asleep with Z and I got our bed all to myself ahhhhhh :)

Four for Four

So who's bright idea was it to have four shots at the four-year well-child ped visit? I hate needles so I think I was more anxious about this event than Z ever could have been. I had heard some say not to tell your child they are having shots, just take them to the doctor and spring it on them. I heard others say to warn them and not make a big deal about it. We chose the latter route simply because I know my Z and I know he likes to have all the facts and details about everything.

So when I mentioned his doctor visit about a week before the actual appointment, Z was full of all his usual questions...when, where, why, how and of course WHAT? He asked me where the shots would go and if they would hurt and I told him they would probably hurt just a little bit and then it would be over and we'd go do something he wanted to do. That was enough for him, he didn't make a big fuss at all. He mentioned several times to various people that after his birthday he would go to the doctor and have shots, but it was just a fact that he was stating.

So yesterday I didn't mention the doctor at all until I picked him up from school and he said "Oh, okay, I will go have my shots." The appointment was very normal, he's still taller than most kids his age and weighs more because of his height...I sometimes wonder where all those pounds go; he's so skinny! Dr. B came in and checked him out...eyes, ears nose, throat, heart, lungs oh and yes, boy parts.

Z giggled a little when Dr. B. looked down his pants and then matter of factly said..."Dr. Boarman! Why did you look at my (insert correct boy anatomy part here)?" Dr. B didn't hear him at first, so Z repeated louder. Then the doctor just said it was part of the exam to make sure it was okay and that seemed to pacify Z. Dr. B let Z use all his instruments and check out Tucker bear (who was still wearing his hospital gown and bandages from Z's tonsil surgery last summer) and our newly acquired "floppy cow" stuffed animals. He gave Z a sack full of goodies for his doctor kit at home and then he sent nurse Linda in with the infamous needles.

Z kept careening his head trying to watch the whole process and David and I kept telling him it might be better if he didn't watch, but there was really no stopping him. He was super curious even though a bit nervous. The first needle went in and all we heard from Z was a little grimace and an "ouch." The second needle got the same response. The third...well there was a little more nerves in his "ouch" and he added "that really hurt my leg!" But, we didn't get tears until the fourth one...the dreaded hot shot - MMR. So it burned and he let us know as much. He kept asking me when the needles were going to come out of his legs. Poor thing, thought Linda left them there. I assured him there were no needles in his legs and then he said "But, those needles left holes in my legs."

I had to explain the holes were so tiny that they already closed up and then we had a conversation about how porous skin is and how we already have holes all over our bodies...aye, aye, aye!

After two suckers and three stickers, Dr. B told Z that he really was one of his best ever patients and that if all patients were that good, Dr. B wouldn't be so old, HA! He also told me how smart he thinks Z is and how he must be reading on a second-grade level by now haha. I told him Z was more interested in geography than reading right now, but he's paying attention to his phonics as well. He asked Z if he'd ever thought of a career in acting and Z said he has (even though he likely doesn't know what that meant) and Dr. B said "Good, because you're way funnier than that kid on Two and a Half Men."

Now I'm gonna have to look up this TV kid and see what's he's talking about haha.

and it's One, Two, Three Frames, You're Out...

Alrighty, Z's first bowling experience was not especially pleasant. You see, David is a serious bowler and he hasn't played in about 6 years. Yes, we've been married just under 6 years, so I suppose this is all my fault hmmm? Anyway, I got a little sneaky because I knew he missed it and he really needs a hobby. I got him hooked up with a league that plays on Friday nights. At first he was just going to be an alternate for the rest of this season, but it turns out there was an opening and now he's a full timer.

The first week, he went by himself, but last week we decided to make it a family affair. Now I'm not a big bowler by any stretch of the imagination. I do have fond memories of bowling alleys and nachos though as I used to tag along with my mom and grandma in their league bowling days. I know it sounds silly, but those were the best nachos in the world...or maybe it was just because my Ma bought them and shared them with me....probably the latter. Geez I miss her, but I digress.

So Z and I ate Nachos last week...they were pretty nasty, I must admit...and watched David bowl while we waited for our own lane. They finally called our name and said we could play one game if we were done in about 45 mins. I thought...NO problem, we'd be done in 30 or less...HA HA HA. We picked out our mighty 8 lb balls and put on those nasty shoes (I swear I'm not wearing them ever again, I forgot how completely unfashionable and ugly they are) Mine were fushia and neon yellow...seriously?

We got the computer set up and the bumpers raised and I led Z up to the line to push his ball....it was the slowest moving ball I've ever seen, and that's when I realized we'd be lucky to finish in an hour...much less 45 mins. By the third frame, he was getting bored....he pushed his ball and it went about 3 feet and pretty much stopped...great, now what? Well, I forgot how slippery the lanes were and told Z to just walk out there and give it a push. Losing mom points yet again, he shuffled out there and leaned down to push the ball and yes...he fell. He got up and then picked up the ball...crap....before I could tell him to put it down, he fell again - this time the ball landed on his lap, smushed his fingers to the wood lane and he was crying. Obviously only thinking of saving my child, I walked out onto the lane and yes, surely and very suddenly my legs flew out from under me and I landed flat on my tail bone, legs out in front barely missing my child's face with my nasty bowling shoes. That sent him into a bigger cry and there we sat 3 feet into the lane, me holding him while he cried. I'm still baffled by the way NOT ONE PERSON offered to help us out...RUDE. I later found out that one lady on David's team saw the whole thing and never bothered to tell him...nice, real nice. So we crawled out and Z decided right then and there he hated bowling and he would not push another ball.

I do not waste money and we had paid $12 for this awesome experience, so I had to finish the whole thing by myself. He followed me to the lane each frame, so I couldn't really swing the ball. I think I bowled about a 60 that night...nice, real nice. Oh, did I mention that I really could not care less about bowling?

Then in the 8th frame...some magical happened. The people in the next lane had this metal contraption, apparently made for children to roll the ball down onto the lane so it's not such a painful wait for the ball to make it to the pins. They let us use it and Z became an instant fan of the sport because now, it was not bowling, it was a ball on a roller coaster, flying down the lane to massively destruct white poles and then waiting for the ball to magically reappear in the ball return...how does that happen so fast anyway?

So tonight, we'll try our hand again at bowling...only this time, we'll use the roller coaster beginning on frame ONE! I think most of the soreness of last week's disaster has worn off and we'll try to toe the line this time :) Still not sure if Z is going to love this as much as his daddy.

Suck It O'Charley's ...umm let me explain

So last night after work, we headed over to O'Charley's because we had a gift certificate to blow and we are a very "eat-out" kind of family. (Side note: if you ever don't know what to get any of us for anything...get us restaurant gift certificates lol). Z ordered chocolate milk, mandarin oranges and a house salad with white dressing and as we were waiting, he commenced singing The Ants Go Marching One by One Hoorah, Hoorah....well in the first verse the little one stops to suck his thumb yada yada. Z gets to verse three and can't remember what the little one stops to do....so he stops and then just loudly says SUCK IT!

Now I have to admit my reaction should've been more stern, however, all I could do was laugh hysterically. Pretty soon the waiter was in on the laughing and Z thought he was just the star of his own little show and so he kept repeating the phrase. I finally calmed down and told him that wasn't a good thing to say and he didn't understand because the little one stops to SUCK his thumb...we SUCK on lemons in our tea, etc. It was really hard to try to explain to my newly-turned 4 entertainer that in that context, it was not a nice thing to say. Let's see that would be mother-failure number...oh, I don't know....this week.

The moon is full of cheese and well, he's probably right

For all I know, the moon IS full of cheese. It's more fun to think that anyway, right? Random conversations with an almost-4-year-old. Apparently this last full moon was the closest to the Earth the moon will be in well...a year. So it looked so huge and me and Z love to look at the moon anyway. I told him it was almost full...he asked me what was it full of and of course daddy told him cheese. I hope they don't really start taking a lot of tourists to the moon anytime soon because we are a fairly cheese-lovin culture and you'd probably get hungry on the moon. ...then in a few decades, no more moon...we will have made queso dip from the entire ball.

Dethroning the lion king

Well, some people say that when they turn 4, a child magically becomes easier to discipline...let's hope that's true for Z...and us! We have plenty of good times and I love the discovery part of this age. We also have had intense power struggles, so we knew we needed to get a hold on Z's worldview really fast. You see, in his worldview, we are here to serve him, obey him and basically let me call all the shots whether it has to do with bedtime routines or when and why we leave the house. If we ever utter a word that might not fit into his daily plan, he gives us what for and fast. Sometimes that includes hitting, screaming, stomping and various other annoying reactions.

I admit, those reactions push every button I apparently have and I have been known to yell back, spank, and probably act a little immature myself.

Well it's time for that to all stop and for the little "king" to come down from the throne. Mama has been empowered and well, I would not try to cross her my little pretty :) I'm taking the scepter back!

It started this week with a hellacious a.m. battle that went something like this:

Me walking into Z's room in the early a.m. singing (yes it was a Monday): Good morning to you, good

Z interrupting with hands over face: DO ....NOT....LOOK...AT...ME

Me: hmmm okay (walked out to go get myself ready)

I went back into his room and flipped on a light in the front half of his room....not above his head. I needed that light to pick out clothes for him to wear to school. Mind you, I did NOT say a word to him before he started ranting at me.

Z: GET OUT OF HERE, I DON'T WANT TO LOOK AT YOU, I DON'T LIKE YOU, WHO is gonna be my teacher?

Me: You need to stop being so rude, NOW, that's your only warning mister. We are going to get up and get ready for school.

Z: I DON'T WANT to go to school, I DON'T LIKE MY SCHOOL; I DON'T LIKE MY TEACHERS and I DON'T LIKE YOU MOMMY!

Me calmly: oh okay, well that's too bad that you feel that way. Please get out of your bed and let Daddy help with your clothes.

Z: NO, NO I WILL NOT GET UP, I WILL NOT GET ON MY CLOTHES, THEY ARE COLD, YOU GO PUT THEM IN THE DRYER AND WARM THEM UP...NOW

At that point, I just left the room. It was very difficult to do...to stay calm and not react...not give him what he was seeking...a giant blowup. So David went outside and started the car (it was 8 degrees so it would take awhile to warm up) and Z freaked out thinking we were leaving. He was yelling our names and I didn't answer. Pretty soon he got up, totally transformed (or so I thought) and from the top of the stairs said "I'm out of my bed."

So once he figured out we did not in fact leave him alone, he went back to his ranting at which point I just told David that after he came back from dropping us off to just remove the prized radio from Z's room. When all was said and done that morning, Z had said he was going to put himself in timeout and could not get ready yet because he was in said timeout. Well we don't do timeout anymore in the true sense of the word, but he doesn't know that. We didn't have time to do the full room time that our new strategy includes so I threatened to take him to school half dressed; he didn't like that...put himself back in timeout and began hitting the walls and anything that came remotely close to him...cats, daddy, etc. David wanted to spank him but I convinced him to hold off for the time (in hindsight he should've promptly been thrown over a knee and swatted about 3 times for complete defiance).

Long story somewhat shorter...bedtime came that night and I just felt all hades was going to break out when he saw that boom box gone so prior to that I offered to cuddle him in his bed for 5 mins after we read books and he said "Really? Okay, that means daddy won't have to do it tonight." haha anyway, we got into his room, climbed into bed and then this is what happened.

Z: Where is my radio?

Me: Well, do you remember this morning before school...how badly you acted? You were yelling at mommy and daddy and saying no about putting on clothes. And, you were hitting walls, spitting and disobeying our rules?

Z: uh huh, yes I do

Me: Well, that is why the radio is gone.

Z: okay, can I have it back now

Me: Most certainly not, it's gone for at least three days..at least until Thursday.

Z singing slowly to the tune of Oh My Darlin' Clementine: Sunday, Monday....Tuesday Wednesday...Thursday, Friday, Saturday....

Z : What is today Mommy?

Me: Monday

Z now starts to sing to the tune of frere Jacques: Today is Monday, Today is Monday all day long, all day long, tomorrow will be....Mommy, what is tomorrow?

Me: Tuesday

Z: tomorrow will be Tuesday, tomorrow with me Thursday? all day long, all day long

Me: Nope, tomorrow will be Tuesday, then you have Wednesday, then Thursday.

Z: oh....oh....where's my radio

Me: I already explained why your radio is gone.

Z: I know, but WHERE is it?

Me: I don't know.

Z: you don't know? why?

Me: because daddy put it away

Z: but, where?

Me: not important, end of discussion.

So not as bad as I thought.

Cue to Tuesday morning and the tantrum-prone king reduced to a prince at this point emerges from his room...willing gets half his clothes on then begins ranting again. Told David we once again cannot react emotionally to the outburst but there will now be no Mickey Mouse or Olivia the rest of the week. This has also not been a popular punishment, but this morning was a rare moment with Z getting dressed without a hitch. We briefly had a scuffle about how many dried pineapples he was going to get after he ate his toast, but he realized he wasn't winning so he forfeited this one. Took him to school with white eyes instead of red, breathing normally...wow, not bad.

I know we are not finished the decoronation process, but I think he's starting to see he is not going to phase me with his antics anymore and that it really is in his best interest to be a subject, not royalty. I have felt amazingly liberated by remaining very calm. I'm sure my blood pressure thanks me.

Hopefully we won't ever get to the point where we have to "kick him out of the garden of eden" as John Rosemond says....but I wouldn't hesitate too much if that is what it takes to reign in this "ruler" so that he'll be a respectful, self-controlled ...and yes, sweet, child very soon.

Good Riddence 2009 :)

Well I almost forgot my password, it's been so long since I logged in...ooops. Seriously though, October and November were so jam packed with photo sessions, I barely had time to breathe. But, I loved every minute of it and I am looking forward to spring to do it all over again.

I don't think I can ever remember a year with so much grief and sorrow packed into 52 weeks as this year and I'm ever hopeful that 2010 will not follow that same pattern. We lost so many people we loved this year and though I absolutely believe they are in a better world with Christ, I still miss them dearly in this world.

So here's to you my dear friends who are celebrating a New Year and a New Life:
Angela Cox -I can still hear you laugh and I can still see your smile.
David Meade- I can still hear your wit and sarcasm and my blue office walls remind me of the work you put into them everyday!
Alecia Ward - I still think of you everytime I go to Walmart and see some choice "fashion" bloopers. I still hear your laugh and sarcasm and how you always were so interested in my life.
Joe Hughes - I'll never forget how you made me feel so at home in your home and in your family during my college years at OSU.
Leroy Cravens - I can still see your sweet face sitting at the back of the church on a Wed. night waving at me as I sang.
Malinda Bowman - Wow, I have so many memories...starting Collegiate CattleWomen with you at OSU, visiting you during your illness, seeing your positive outlook even in the worst of times...your faith has inspired me.
Jean McCoy - David's aunt was a special lady and we were shocked to lose her this week. I still remember her hugs and smiles and hospitality.

Aside from all the sadness, there has been plenty of joy....David finished his MBA; Zachary started preschool and wow is he smart. Zachary also moved up into the official boy's gymnastic's program at Legacy and WOW, he's so strong and so talented. We hope he continues to enjoy it there.

We've met new friends, reconnected with old friends and tried our best to maintain friendships with all we can. We were blessed to spend time with my mom and sister for an extended time around Thanksgiving and it was just what I needed. Made me realize once again how much I miss home.

Well friends, I hope you're holding your family close and not taking anything or anyone for granted as you go into 2010. May you be blessed beyond meausre and fully experience the grace and power of God in this coming year.!