Moving up and moving on...the big boy bed

First of all, shout out to Ralph Goreham - one of THE most talented carpenters in Lexington. Soon I'll have a picture of his final product to show you guys. He's done his part, now I just have to finish his masterpiece.

Zachary loves everything to do with cowboys and horses; he has been to the Boot Store one time and that was to get his John Deere cowboy boots. His memory is so good regarding that experience that he can point to the Boot Store when we drive by and talk about his boots. He loves polo shirts because they have "horsies" on them. He rides, feeds and pets his two rocking horses. He has a cowboy figurine that he sometimes puts by his plate at mealtime so he can "feed the hungry cowboy. Maybe I've sort of forced him into this obsession since I decorated his nursery in retro western flair. But I was honestly just trying to avoid the obsession some kids have with Pooh or Barney or any other animated character... and so far, it's worked!! Regardless, when making the decision to move out of the crib into a big boy bed, I've tried to be very "extreme makeover creative" about the whole thing. Of course, I've tried to avoid the extreme makeover prices.

We decided to go ahead and go with a full size bed to maximize the time Zach uses the bed. I saw an ad on craigslist.org about a guy in Lexington who said he could build anything a person could describe from a drawing, a picture or just a description. I ran several ideas by him, but we both finally agreed on a covered wagon bed. Yes the bed looks like a real covered wagon! He built the bed and delivered it within 10 days! Amazing! The stain even matches the current furniture in the room. He made everything but the cover, which I'm trying to figure out right now. We'll have it all together soon. The bows that hold the cover are removeable so it's sort of like a playhouse on top of a very sturdy bed. I'm not going to post a picture until it's completely done...ooh the suspense for my millions of readers hahah. It's actually only 2 or 3, but that's not why I write the blog.

The day the bed moved in, we were trying to get Zach all hyped up for the move and he was really playing into it. He loved climbing up in the bed. You could just see the cautious excitement in his eyes. Yes I almost cried. Geez, why am I such an emotional girl?!?! I KNOW this should be a great moment for all of us, but where did my baby go?

He resurfaced about 1 am when he sat boltright up in bed and started screaming for mommy. I think he was just totally confused as to where he was and he forgot he got a new bed! Thankfully we had enough forethought to make it a full, so daddy slept with him the rest of the night. Since that first night, he's done incredibly well once he finally falls asleep. There have even been a few mornings when I've had to wake him, which if you know us, is an extremely RARE event. I think he probably needed to move out of that crib months ago; he was just too cramped. A lot of my friends warned me that he would constantly be getting up and running around the house or to our room, but the funny thing is he hasn't gotten out of the bed at all. I'm not saying he never will (I hope he eventually gets up himself to go potty), but for now I'll take this!

I've been really sappy over this whole ordeal and maybe I made it a big deal for me too, not just for Zachary, so that I could handle it better. I know children are a gift from God and that He is just entrusting us to take care of His children for a little while here on Earth. Knowing that doesn't make the giving up process any easier. I've been basically giving him away since he was born:

• giving him to the nurses to run all his tests and clean him up right after birth;
• giving him to the doctors to stick needles in him;
• giving him to nursery workers at church so that I can worship;
• giving him to the babysitter because I have to work;
• giving him to himself because he wants to be more independent;
• giving him to the occasional weekend night babysitter so I can nuture my relationship with my husband;
• and now, giving him to the natural process of growing up and needing me less.

Wow, it's hard isn't it? I think it's rough on me and I don't even know the details of Zachary's future. Think about how hard it was for God to give his only son to the thing he hated most - sin. Think of how hard it was for God to give his pure and only son to those guards who beat him beyond recognition and then nailed him to cross. Really think how hard it was for God to turn his face away from his one and only son as he took all of our sins upon himself. Think about how unimaginable it was for God to watch his only son be buried in a tomb and to watch the people's hopelessness around Him. Some may say "well, yeah but he knew the future, he knew that he was resurrecting his son three days later to give the world more hope than they'd ever known." But honestly, even if I knew my son would live victorious, I could never hand him over and watch as he was beaten and killed. I could never say "well, it's okay, he'll be fine in a few days." I never truly understood all of that until I had my own child, and he's not really even mine; I'm really just God's babysitter.